Helping Others


The Shambhala training is based on developing gentleness and genuineness so that we can help ourselves and develop tenderness in our hearts. We no longer wrap ourselves in the sleeping bag of our cocoon. We feel responsible for ourselves, and we feel good taking responsibility. We also feel grateful that, as human beings, we can actually work for others. It is about time that we did something to help the world. It is the right time, the right moment, for this training to be introduced.

The fixation of ego is manifested in the words I am. Then there is the conclusion: I am . . . happy or I am . . . sad. There is the first thought (I) and the second thought (am), and finally the third thought is the conclusion. I am happy, I am sad, I feel miserable, I feel good whatever the thought may be. The Shambhala idea of responsibility is to drop am. Just say, I happy, I sad. I know there's a bit of a linguistic problem here, but I hope that you can understand what I'm saying. The point is to be responsible to others, without self-confirmation.

To put it slightly differently, suppose your name is Sandy. There is Sandy, and there is the world. You don't need a verb between them as confirmation. Just be kind to others. Sandy should be genuine. When she is the real, genuine Sandy, she can help others a lot. She may not have any training in first aid, but Sandy can put a Band-Aid on someone's finger. Sandy is no longer afraid to help, and she is very kind and on the spot. When you begin to help others, you have raised your head and shoulders, and you're stepping out of your cocoon. The point of the Shambhala training is not to produce fake people. The point is to become a real person who can help others.

Being in the cocoon is almost like being a child in the womb, a child who doesn't particularly want to come out. Even after you're born, you aren't happy about being toilet-trained. You would prefer to stay in your nappies, your diapers. You like to have something wrapped around your bottom all the time. But eventually, your diapers are taken away. You have no choice. You have been born, and you've been toilet-trained; you can't stay forever in your diapers. In fact, you might feel quite free, no longer having a diaper wrapped around your bum. You can move around quite freely. You might eventually feel quite good about being free from the tyranny that parenthood and home life impose.

Still, we don't really want to develop discipline. So we begin to create this little thingy, this little cocoon. We get wrapped up in all sorts of things. When we're in the cocoon, we don't want to sit upright and eat with good table manners. We don't really want to dress elegantly, and we don't want to conform to any discipline that requires even three minutes of silence. That's partly because of being raised in North America, where everything is built for children to entertain themselves. Entertainment is even the basis for education. If you can raise your own children outside of the cocoon, you will raise lots of bodhisattva children, children who are real and face facts and are actually able to relate with reality properly. I have done that myself with my own children, and it seems to have worked out.

As decent human beings, we face the facts of reality. Whether we are in the middle of a snowstorm or a rainstorm, whether there is family chaos, whatever problems there may be, we are willing to work them out. Looking into those situations is no longer regarded as a hassle, but it is regarded as our duty. Although helping others has been preached quite a lot, we don't really believe we can do it. The traditional American expression, as I've heard it, is that we don't want to get our fingers dirty. That, in a nutshell, is why we want to stay in the cocoon: we don't want to get our fingers dirty. But we must do something about this world, so that the world can develop into a nonaggressive society where people can wake themselves up. Helping others is one of the biggest challenges.

I appreciate your inquisitiveness, your sense of humor, and your relaxation. Please try to elegantize yourselves and step out of the cocoon. The basic point is to become very genuine within yourselves. This means being free from the plastic world, if such a thing is possible. Also, please don't hurt others. If you can't do that, at least treat yourself better and don't punish yourself by sleeping in your cocoon. Finally, please try to work with people and be helpful to them. A fantastically large number of people need help. Please try to help them, for goodness sake, for heaven and earth. Don't just collect Oriental wisdoms one after the other. Don't just sit on an empty zafu, an empty meditation cushion. But go out and try to help others, if you can. That is the main point.

We have to do something. We've got to do something. As we read in the newspapers and see on television, the world is deteriorating, one thing after the other, every hour, every minute, and nobody is helping very much. Your help doesn't have to be a big deal. To begin with, just work with your friends and work with yourself at the same time. It is about time that we became responsible for this world. It will pay for itself.